Saturday, April 7, 2018

What?! The Dishes? Again?


(Image taken from https://www.deseretnews.com/top/2860/22/President-Gordon-B-Hinckley-33-tips-for-Mom-and-Dad-Parenting-advice-encouragement-from-LDS.html#sUS3sUbkB5h8glLO.32)

Have you ever heard or said these words? I have – heard them and said them. There is many a day when I look at a sink full of dirty dishes and wish there was some magic I could do to just make them go away. Same with the laundry that never seems to be done. There are days that I just don’t want to do any of the work that comes with having a home and family. 

Work. Family work. That is what this post is going to cover. My main resource for this post is “The Meaning and Blessings of Family Work” by Kathleen Slaugh Bahr, Kristine Manwaring, Cheri Lovelace, and Erick Baily Bahr. (Hawkins, et al., pp. 213-224)

Why do we need to do work? There are two principles from the Proclamation that come to mind when it comes to work. The first is “Successful marriages and families are established and maintained of principles of … work.” (7) The other one is that parents have a duty to teach their children “to love and serve one another.” ( 6)

Work seems to be an important part of this mortal existence, whether we like it or not. Bahr, et al., point out that when Adam and Eve were removed from the garden, they were turned out into a cursed world that required them to work “for [their] sake.” (Genesis 3:17-19) The fall of Adam and Eve, which brought us into the mortal world, created the need for work. It is part of the Plan that will bring us back to our Father in Heaven. 

Consider some of these quotes from Bahr and her associates:

“Family work provides endless opportunities to recognize and fill other needs. It thus teaches us to love and serve on another, inviting us to be like Jesus Christ.” (Hawkins, et al., p. 213)

“When family members work together in the right spirit, a foundation of caring and commitment grows out of their shared experience. The most ordinary tasks, like fixing meals or doing laundry, hold great potential for connecting us to those we sere and with whom we serve.” (Hawkins, et al., p. 214)

What I take from this is that I am looking at the work that is required of mean in the wrong light. Yes, it is work, but more than that, it is service. Is my bad attitude towards work teaching my children to have a bad attitude toward work? Absolutely. This is one of the things I am committing to changing. If I can change my perspective from “work is bad” to “work is service towards the ones I love” then my children will learn to have a different perspective about work.

One of the reasons, as I mention earlier, that I tend to dislike the work of home and family is that is just never seems to be done. It just repeats over, and over, and over again. However, Bahr, et al., teach another very important principle. “The positive aspect of such repetition is that it facilitates learning. … Some chores may become daily rituals that teach love and forge family ties, building family identity moment by moment amidst talking, teasing, singing, and storytelling.” (Hawkins, et al., p. 215)

Again, what am I teaching my children by my own attitude toward work? If there is one chapter from this class that I feel I can really apply and work towards improvement on, it is this chapter. Generally, I just want work to go away. However, work is the most important and basic principles of mortal life. “The daily rituals of family work are the Lord’s gift and blessing to all people and cultures, providing daily opportunities for parents to teach while working alongside their children, for husbands to draw close to their wives, and for sibling to band while they work together to sere the family. … Instead of asking how to make such work go away, parents should ask how to use it to increase love and joy in their families. (Hawkins, et al., p. 223)

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